Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Those In Japanese Glasses Shouldn't Throw Stones

Igor is a lot like the girl from The Magic School Bus. Remember her? The one that starts every sentence with "according to my research..." and then talks about a random irrelevant fact to show that she reads the encyclopedia before bed every night. This is another key aspect of Igor's choice of life: demonstrating intellect by memorizing facts, figures, and specifications about things that nobody with a life would possibly care about:

(Normal Person): Hey, that's a nice looking car!
(Igor): Yeah, I know, totally, it was actually designed by a bunch of asian kids who rebelled from the Nike factory 10 years ago then saved pennies to end up going to an industrial design school and eventually came up with the "flaming crap" design philosophy. It actually utilizes a 2.6L engine that General Motors created in 1993 to avoid the rising prices of oil thanks to OPEC. OPEC is an interesting organization, they were founded by....
(Normal Person): Yeah, that's great, I'm going to go scratch the chalkboard with my fingernails now to drown out your voice.

I think this might be a property of IB people in general, they must demonstrate their academic prowess given any opportunity at all. The unfortunate part is that his academic and life success is highly suspect in the first place. This behaviour spans all fields from technology to the best non-stick pan at Ikea.

This is quite annoying, I think we can all agree on that. But the worst part is that he passes judgement on people when they purchase everyday products without going through the weeks of meticulous research that he has the time for. "OMG, I can get that so much cheaper in Hong Kong", "That's going to be out of date in 3 months", "That brand is for jocks", "Ew, you really bought that?" etc.

Yes, he actually judges your character based on the products you buy! He respects people that have nicer things than him and ridicules people who don't. This is the beginning of the class system in Canada, its epic. But more importantly, its painfully annoying. You can't even buy milk without this kid talking about how he could drive 50km to get it 10 cents cheaper!

You would think that somebody this critical of others would have impeccable style and taste in all aspects of life - you would be wrong. This is the kid that brought the low cut, LILAC coloured v-neck sweater into Canada. He wore it with pride too. A follower has recently informed me that "The color lilac is sometimes associated with lesbianism." (Wikipedia). He also wears sportswear when the most exercise he gets each day is walking to his car and back.

Igor is a character alright. Something REALLY spicy will be up tomorrow, keep checking back.

1 comment:

  1. "he actually judges your character based on the products you buy"

    well, according to my research, this is called conspicuous consumption.

    on another note..."Something REALLY spicy will be up tomorrow"....anticlimatic much batman?